Advice For My Younger Self // An Ode To My Twenties

As I approach my 30th birthday, I’ve started to daydream about sitting down with myself in two stages of life. I imagine me, as an almost 30-year-old, and then me, a recent college graduate, sitting down at a local coffee shop. One of us would order a cappuccino with a half pump of vanilla and the other would order a caramel macchiato (our coffee orders haven’t changed much).

What would I say to my younger self? Is there any helpful advice I could share after living through my 20th decade and coming out on the other side?

I asked a few friends who are also entering this new decade of life what they’d say. The responses have been wise nuggets of wisdom.

advice for my younger self

Calm the f@ck down. From a young age we’ve been programmed to achieve, achieve, achieve. When school no longer sets the structure of personal achievement and you’re thrust into a wide-open world of possibilities, you can feel frozen. As cliche as it sounds, life will work out the way it is supposed to work out. And it will probably work out better than you could have EVER even imagined. If you had told me during my senior year at Texas A&M that I’d move across the country and settle in Alabama, I would have spit out my Diet Dr. Pepper mid-sip. I didn’t know ANYONE with connections to Alabama at that point in my life. And now I couldn’t imagine a happier chapter of my life. It’s all going to be ok.
There is no such thing as a perfect time. I feel like many of us hesitate to make a decision until we feel 100% positive it is the right choice. Or that the timing is optimal. Big life decisions are scary! I can tell you with certainty that I was NOT certain about attending Texas A&M when I hit the “accept” button. And I was also not certain about moving back home after graduation. I hesitated starting Living & Local because I thought the market was saturated and I was self-conscious. All of those decisions led me down a path that I ended up loving. Learning to operate within a level of uncertainty is ok! Look at the situation at “Path 1” and “Path 2” versus “the right choice” and “the wrong choice”. Your path will continue moving forward either way.
Trust your instincts. There will be a lot of noise coming at you from all directions … and a lot of people might try and discount you for your age. It’s always wise to listen and discern. However, you know what’s right for you.
Relationships are a VALUABLE investment. In college, you’re surrounded by friends. Post-college, everyone splits off which makes it a lot harder to call someone up to go for a cocktail on a random Tuesday night. You will have to WORK to keep up with your humans, and this is the best investment of time you can make in your early 20s. And throughout life. Quality friendships are a KEY component to your personal happiness. Also, it’s ok if your friend group shrinks! Quality over quantity ALL DAY EVERY DAY. You won’t have time to keep up with everything (life is a constant juggling act) and you CERTAINLY don’t have time for negative relationships. Don’t be afraid to cut ties with people who don’t truly love you. Keep up with people. Plan the trip to Portugal. Continue to make memories with each other. The same goes for family. Call your grandparents. Visit your parents. Your family is forever.
Your professional career doesn’t define your worth. Your job is a vocation and a way to be a contributing member of society. It is important to do good work. However, you are replaceable at your job. You are NOT replaceable at home.
Don’t let fear of what other people think keep you from going for what you want. I used to be afraid of taking pictures in public for the blog, fearful of what other people would think of me. Honestly, I’m still not 100% comfortable with it, but I know I want the shot. And if I had let this fear take over, I wouldn’t have connected with so many wonderful people through the blog! I was also afraid of taking up golf, because I thought I would look uncoordinated and embarrass myself in front of a bunch of pros. Update: you will look uncoordinated because you are a BEGINNER. And that’s ok! Everyone starts somewhere. And now I LOVE to get out on the course. Don’t ask me how many times I still whiff, though…
Be kind. Unfortunately, adults are just bigger children. There is still drama and there are still mean people out there. Be as kind as you can. The world needs more kind humans.

And I then would lean over my cappuccino with a half pump of vanilla and say to my younger, “You’re doing great. Don’t stop being you.”